troubled mind

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Posts by troubled mind

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  20

  Received a very heart felt phone call tonite over the Df Watchtower article

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight one of my sons called me just to say ," mom i love you !

  " .. he told me that this weekend he had read a thread posted by kyria about the new watchtower on shunning df'd relatives ,and that it had really made him sad .

  he said, " mom, i am so glad we are all out of the jehovah's witnesses ....i just don't think i could of stood it to think you guys not talking to me ...it really upsets me .

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  troubled mind

  ((( Flipper and 00Dad ))) Please hang in there and keep reaching out to your kids ....that is all you can do is offer them the olive branch and let them know how much you care no matter how badly they treat you . The sick mind garbage that they recieve through the Watchtower keeps them in a constant stae of confusion mentally and emotionally .....

  I vividly remember those days myself ! For years I would struggle internally because my oldest brother was DA'd . As a teen I would keep in contact with him regularly ,then after my baptism @17 I felt the pressure to follow the Watchtower counsel and shun him . Over the years my heart would relent and I would yearn to speak with him . We had limited contact . In my mind I lived a fantasy that if I did what Jehovah expected then my brother would come back . I would look for him at Conventions thinking he might show . As the yrs went by I married and had children ,he married and had a child yet we remained apart . I started thinking "What is so wrong with him having his own opinion ? He is a good man ,a great Dad ,he just doesn't want to be a JW ...So what ! " . My love for him remained strong . I felt unworthy as a Witness because I could not love Jehovah more than my family . It caused deep depression in me . I could not mentally break free from the cult mind control . Then ,as I saw my own children going through Watchtower HELL , I started to become stronger . When I went through seeing my Witness Mother suffer and die , realized how short this life is and precious . I did not want to waste one more second doing something that was not making me happy ,SO I LEFT the Watchtower society and began living life .

  How lucky i was that my brother never was bitter or angry with me . He was hurt and sad over the years ,but he never held that over me or kept a grudge . He was DA'd at age 18 .....He was 52 when I finally quit the JW's .......A LONGTIME ,but not forever . We now enjoy Thanksgiving together at his house for the past six yrs . This past Christmas was the FIRST time ever my whole family, and his, plus our never a JW Father were together to share a holiday and a meal .

  Look how long it took me to wake up ....there is hope for your loved ones too . Keep the door open to them . Make them understand you love them no matter what .
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  20

  Received a very heart felt phone call tonite over the Df Watchtower article

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight one of my sons called me just to say ," mom i love you !

  " .. he told me that this weekend he had read a thread posted by kyria about the new watchtower on shunning df'd relatives ,and that it had really made him sad .

  he said, " mom, i am so glad we are all out of the jehovah's witnesses ....i just don't think i could of stood it to think you guys not talking to me ...it really upsets me .

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  troubled mind

  I just hope my experience gives someone else the courage to do what they know they need to do . I know it is HARD ,I know it is scarry BUT I also know how much better it really can be . Sometimes it does woirk out !

  We came out immediate family intact : Mom ,Dad three children ,and one of the children's mate. We have also had losses : thirty yrs worth of friends ALL of them , one set of grandparents ,cousins ,Aunts and Uncles...

  But we still have each other and are making the most of that and re-building other relationships to fill in the gaps left by other once loved ones .

  Have courage follow your heart and what your soul is telling you . Unlike what the Jws say Your heart is NOT treacherous ...It is your inner voice listen to it !
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  13

  I found my cousins

  by noni1974 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found 3 of my cousins who are not jw's on facebook and i have friend requested them and two of them have accepted so far.

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  troubled mind

  Awesome Noni ! Very happy for you ,facebook has connected me to former friends that left yrs before me .We might not be close ,but sharing on facebook is at least closing the gap a bit . I am sure your cousins will catch up with you quickly .
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  20

  Received a very heart felt phone call tonite over the Df Watchtower article

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight one of my sons called me just to say ," mom i love you !

  " .. he told me that this weekend he had read a thread posted by kyria about the new watchtower on shunning df'd relatives ,and that it had really made him sad .

  he said, " mom, i am so glad we are all out of the jehovah's witnesses ....i just don't think i could of stood it to think you guys not talking to me ...it really upsets me .

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  troubled mind

  ((Thanks Zid)))
• 
  20

  Received a very heart felt phone call tonite over the Df Watchtower article

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight one of my sons called me just to say ," mom i love you !

  " .. he told me that this weekend he had read a thread posted by kyria about the new watchtower on shunning df'd relatives ,and that it had really made him sad .

  he said, " mom, i am so glad we are all out of the jehovah's witnesses ....i just don't think i could of stood it to think you guys not talking to me ...it really upsets me .

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  troubled mind

  Tonight one of my sons called me just to say ," Mom I love you ! " .

  He told me that this weekend he had read a thread posted by Kyria about the new Watchtower on shunning DF'd relatives ,and that it had really made him sad . He said, " Mom, I am so glad we are all out of the Jehovah's Witnesses ....I just don't think I could of stood it to think you guys not talking to me ...It really upsets me ." It choked me up ...I then reassured him that no matter what we would have never cut off one of our kids ,that is one of the major reasons I had to leave the JWs .

  He has told me recently how much he really likes who I am now .....

  I remember how afraid I was when i decided to stop going to meetings . At that time my two oldest children were still very active . I was so concerned that they would be pressured to shun me ,which I felt at the time would kill me ,but the reality was if I stayed in I might kill myself because I was so unhappy . It was the hardest thing I have done ...to take that leap into the unknown . There were so many 'what ifs'......so many jw instilled fears .....but now looking back it was the best decision I have ever made .

  My heart breaks for many of you on this forum when I read your stories about being stuck in or about your children being kept in by one parent . I feel your pain ,but Don't give up .....please . Sometimes things do work out .
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  18

  Did you DF yourself on purpose?

  by Evidently Apostate in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  lately i have been thinking about saying something apostate to my elder father in law.

  he is an uber witness and actually believed that god interveined and saved him when he had a heart attack and kept him alive, until he told me that and i asked him why jehovah allowed jws in nazi concentration camps to suffer horribly and die but he loved an alcoholic more than them.. i havent been to a kh in 6 months or in service in years.

  i grew a beard and basicallyhe avoids talking to me.

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  troubled mind

  Isn't the announcement the same now whether you DA or are Df'd ? In either case I am pretty sure the announcement is the same ," so and so is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses "
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  34

  What was the first thing you did...

  by OneDayillBeFree in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when you left the man-made organization currently known as the wtbts??.

  and for those still "in" but mentally "out" what have you started doing thats against the silly, stupid and non-scriptural watchtower policy/law/rule??.

  i know the question has been made before on another thread but i couldn't find it and also there's been quite some growth in new ones here to jwn, so just wanted to see if we could all share some lovely/funny/random experiences.

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  troubled mind

  I started celebrating birthdays and holidays right away ,because it felt good and right to share love with my friends and family . Starting going out with friends from work which meant going to bars (oh my) ,and did things other adults do for fun .

  One of the very first things i did was tell my Doctor to take the NO BLOOD information out of my records , and then I went out and registered to vote .
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  28

  Should we attend our first Birthday Party?

  by Flicka in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  so we have only been fading for the past few months but already made up our minds that we are completely out.

  we never managed to make any friends in our cong but we befriended our neighbours.. so our neighbour invited us to her b-day party in a few weeks time.

  she knows that we are/were witnesses and that we are fading.. i don't see a b-day celebration as being wrong anymore.

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  troubled mind

  GO !!! Live life and enjoy ! Don't waste another day worrying about what MAY happen instead move ahead to a new life free from guilt and burdensome rules and unreasonable fear .

  I wasted 44 yrs of life being afraid to live it . The last six have been the happiest of my lifetime ,because now I truly express what I feel instead of what the Watchtower Society tells me I should do or not do .
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  25

  Sparks are gonna fly in my home

  by marriedtoajw in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as i've mentioned in a previous post, my wife has been sending mixed signals to me for years on what she does concerning violating jw rules.

  what i didn't mention at the time was that she has also gone through gung ho sprees from time to time.

  she is now insisting on taking the kids to the hall.

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  troubled mind

  My Dad was never a JW ,but my Mom was ..... He allowed her to teach the children her religion, and to indoctrinate us even though he thought it was a cullt .

  He now blames himself for being weak, and allowing this religion to break up his family . He has seen the harm the Jehovah's Witness religion has caused his own children over the years .

  His oldest son was baptised at 16 ,then at 18 lost interest and joined the Military . The Elders announced at the Kingdom Hall that this son was 'Disassociated' .The internal newsletter called the Kingdom Ministry counseled members to sever ties with such ones even with in your own family to shun them . This meant my Mother cut her own son off from normal family activity . This tore her up inside ,but she believed it was what God required of her to be loyal . This shunning policy does not have a time limit it goes on for life ! My Mom missed her sons wedding , birth of her granddaughter and other major events because the Watchtower corparation said it had authority from Jehovah God to lead and feed his people . My Mother died at age 72 ,my brother was 52 at that time .....he felt his REAL mother had died yrs ago . My Father watched the aftermath as I came to my senses and left the religion a few yrs ago . He has seen as my other Brother a baptised JW stop associating with me or my children because I walked away from his faith . We can not have a family dinner because this son and his family will not eat with my family or my disassociated brothers family . My Dad has seen my lifetime of 'friends' turn away from me because I no longer wish to attend the Kingdom Hall . My non Witness Father who is in his 80's cares for my disabled sister who has lived with him her whole life . She also is a baptised JW . Now that she is homebound her Witness "friends' have dried up and seldom come to check on her . She will not sit in on family gatherings with my older brother still to this day . Even though she is not active the inculcated JW teachings continue to poison her natural ability to persue family affection . My Father staed to me not to long ago he wished he had put his foot down years ago when my Mother first got involved with the Jehovah's Witnesses . He wishes he could turn back time and save his family the heartache it has indured because of this religion . PLEASE SAVE YOUR FAMILY THIS KIND OF FATE ........YOUR CHILDREN DESERVE TO BE HAPPY MAKE SURE YOU ALLOW THEM TO REMAIN FREE
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  13

  Received a nice facebook message from an old JW friend

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  " i really miss you guys ,i hope some day you will come back .

  how are you feeling after surgery?

  i responded thanking her for her concern ,and totally ignored the 'come back' plea .

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  troubled mind

  She is not a facebook friend ,she sent a private message .

  I am no longer a fader ...I openly celebrate Christmas with house completely lit up this year . The Elders were told two yrs ago to cease and desist any contact/harassment of me by way of certified letter (with copy being sent to local Police station .) Since then I do not think anything has been officially announced ,they just gossip enough about me that most people consider me an apostate